Farmer Bob holds his frying pan in front of the powerful rays of a 5g telephone mast as his bacon and sausages sizzle and cook...

Shep, his trusty sheep dog loves a sausage, freshly fried for free (FFFF) by the magical, invisible rays emanating from the 5g tower installed in the farmers fallow field (FFF) Farmer Bob is no stranger to a large, meaty sausage, but prefers half a dozen rashers of bacon, friend until crispy, sandwiched between 2" thick buttered slabs of freshly baked white bread. Bob hasn't quite perfected baking his home made white bread using those free 5g rays, but he's working on it. In the meantime he relies on an older technology for baking...he wraps the bread dough in aluminium foil and carefully places it just above the engine manifold in his trusty tractor. Three hours later, the perfectly baked loaf of bread is ready and Bob and Shep call it a day and settle down to a night of 5g broadband streaming at a lightning fast speed of a zillion mega wotsits! Life's good when you've got a 5g broadband mast installed in your FFF!